Who said a good time has to involve sex? Yes sex is magical and euphoric but in itself, it’s not an end. You can still do plenty of activities without necessarily engaging in the steamy act. All you need to do is be a little creative by thinking outside the box. In 2020 most couples complained that they had no idea of what to do with their partners especially with the lockdown. Suddenly, they had so much time together but very little an idea of how to do it. For the first few weeks they were excited, sex was the only menu on the table. A few weeks into it, they got bored and couldn’t continue. To help you still have a solid relationship, here are 9 ways you can still be intimate with involving sex.

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Recreate your first date

There is always something about the first. I bet you can still remember the taste of food, atmosphere, music, what he wore, and how he looked at you. You are probably closing your eyes right now trying to visualize it. It is possible to get the sparks back by recreating the same. Make a reservation to the same place, order the same food and have them play the same music. Trust me, it will be magic. You’ll see that big grin start to form on his face as he suddenly lets all his guards loose. To spice it up, you can ensure that you wear the same dresses you wore back then.

Make him feel noticed

Have you ever heard your partner getting grumpy that he feels rarely noticed?  They work hard to provide, spend days away from their families, and go through hell and back without much recognition. Make him feel noticed by showing and appreciating his efforts. Call to tell him you appreciate him in a surprise phone call or a text while he’s at work. Let him know that you see what he does.

Take dancing lessons together

You don’t have to be a professional dancer to take up dancing classes. Some basic ones by Passion en Fuego stand out and would be a great couple activity. You can still do it just for fun. Talk to him, encourage him to spare some time out his busy schedule and let him join you for the class. Dancing together not only reverberates your mood but also offers an opportunity for the two of you to connect deeply and intimately. It will also help with your exercise goals as dancing is a great way to stay fit and maintain a healthy heart rate. You can try some classes from Passion en Fuego as they offer a great variety!


Show him intimacy without expectation

Show him love and kindness. Determine his love language and exploit it. Do all this without expecting him to do the same. It will ignite so much passion in him that he will be persuaded to do the same for you. He will most definitely find it romantic which will make him adore you the more. Remember, love attracts love. Try it!

Write him love letters/sticky notes

Who said letters are a thing of the past?  Call me old school but there’s just something about pen and paper and seeing someone’s real handwriting. It shows effort and time. So take a piece of paper, sit down and jot your heart out. You can apply some lipstick and patch some kisses on the letter. Trust me, he will be blushing the entire time as he reads the letter. Also you can make good use of sticky notes. Write some short beautiful love messages on a few notes, stick them at strategic places that you are sure he’ll run into them. Do this and watch your intimacy skyrocket.

Ask him about his fears

Communicating our fears requires a level of vulnerability. Getting your man to talk to you about his fear will most certainly spice up your intimacy. He will be forced to be vulnerable, which will bring you two closer together. He will be more confident and comfortable with you. It will also make him less tense and thus more productive and happier. Remember to get a good time for this as a less tense time will help him open up more.

Maintain eye contact

Some great eye contact will prove to be magic.

Never look away when talking to your partner unless you are lying (which you should not in the first place). Eyes are the gateway to our souls. They communicate sorrow, pain, joy, happiness, hope and love. Stare deep into his eyes. Communicate how deep you love and care for him by simply staring at his eyes. You can do this as you talk or even just in silence. Trust, a gaze alone is enough to show and build intimacy.

Give him a 10 second kiss

Touch is one of the most powerful senses. It melts even the strongest of men. Hold his hands, draw him closer and kiss him passionately on the lips for at least ten seconds. The guy will be smiling the entire day at work. Your face and the kiss will be with him the entire day. Don’t be surprised if he calls or texts you at some point in the day. You can accompany the kiss with an “I love you” whisper to his ears.

Give him praise in public

Men have egos as big as Mt. Everest which are kept in shape by constantly being massaged. If you don’t do it someone else will. So take the initiative. Praise him in public. Let people know what a good partner, father, good cook, good provider or other positive tags he is. That way, he will know how much he’s important to you. That way, you also become his best cheerleader. It is one thing to praise him privately and another to do it publicly.

Take him breakfast in bed

Whether he’s an early riser or not, surprising him with his breakfast in bed will do you the trick. Prepare, a breakfast out of the norm and bring it to him while he’s still in bed. You can even sit on the bed side and either watch him as he eats or feed him. I mean, if he doesn’t appreciate this then there’s definitely something wrong with that guy for sure.

There you have it, some key secrets on how to be intimate without sex. Just know that they could lead to sex though, but that is not a bad thing, is it?

Rachel is a mum of two boys, blogger and a lover of writing all stuff inspirational. Anything to inspire women and mums and you'll find her there. Check out her family's YouTube channel too @presentfatherhood

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